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Since the Wheelmen reformed in 2006 after 120 years, many fields and parks in Westfield have been home to our games.
These include;
- The 'Shire...our true home field (Berkshire Industries)
- Bullens Field
- Jachym Field
- Whitney Field
- South Middle School
- Stanley Park
- Hampton Ponds Park
We are presently entertaining a host of group's proposals for a new facility. It would be very tough to beat the 'Shire
however but we will listen to all offers. See below.
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South Side Park Proposed
Nouveau Riche Land Developer Announces Plan
Westfield, MA / September 21, 2007 - It was reported today that nouveau riche land
developer Al Czervik announced plans to build a ball park on the south side of Westfield. "This town could one day be
as big as Chicago" noted Czervik. He went on to add, "I tell
ya, golf courses and cemeteries, the two biggest wasters of prime real estate!"
Westfield, MA / October 6, 2007 - At
a press conference today, immediately following a Wheelmen doubleheader against the Hartford Dark Blues, it was announced
that a donation of a large sum of money has been offered to the South Side Wheelmen Grounds by the Personal Secretary of the
arrested chairman and CEO of Yokus Oil & Bank Menatep SPB of Russia. "I know it sounds too good to be true but
I received a telegram at the end of our match with the Dark Blues and there it was," noted Wheelmen captain "Gunner" Genovese,
"ya, all we have to do is like "re-profile some funds" or something and we get some nice ching...so what the heck...lets do
it. I suppose we would have to name something after Yokus Bank...perhaps we can have Yokus ATMs all over the ball grounds...sweet!"
Westfield, MA / October 14, 2007 - At
a press conference today, immediately following the final game of the 2007 season during the post game reception with the
Bridgeport Orators, it was announced that another donation of a large sum of money is being secured from the Nigeria Liquefied
Natural Gas Company. "Something about since the inception of democracy in Nigeria they have carefully uncovered
an over invoicing of a whopping sum US$25.5M and want to transfer into our account as a beneficiary" noted Wheelmen founder
and captain Dan "Gunner" Genovese, "I thought they just wanted to hang a sign in the park so it sounds like a great deal.
The Ministry of Finance said the check is the mail."
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Old Strathmore Park to Come Alive
Grandson of Famous Russian Amusement Park Developer Ready
To Launch
Woronoco, MA / September 25, 2007 - High atop Woronoco Mountain, grandson of famous Russian amusement
park developer Maxim Gorky the III, announced the plan to turn the old Strathmore Park into all encompassing baseball
amusement park in order to smooth the way for the proposed power plant for the area. Gorky at one point shouted during the
press conference "I love this game, this base ball but I love weight lifting too...we will have vintage power lifting
matches!" He then proceeded to take off his shoe and pound the Westfield Evening News reporter into submission. After much
speculation, the park at one point during the conference, was set to be named Gorky Park West but after much debate,
the name was changed to BioMess Park.
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Downtown Base Ball Stadium Planned
Whip Manufactuer Heir To Leave Legacy
Westfield, MA / September 29, 2007 - In a press conference today on the town green, whip manufactuer
heir Edwardo Van Haylynn announced plans for a mammoth base ball stadium to be built in the heart of downtown Westfield.
"If you remember, Westfield at one time was the home to whip manufacturing in the 19th century,
not only in the United States but the world," proclamined Van Haylynn, "and of course the Van Haylynn Whip Manufacturing
Company dominated market share. My great great grandfather left me more money than Bill Gates and Warren Buffett could ever
dream of having." The 23 year old Van Haylynn went on to add, "the downtown area is a shambles, I plan on leveling everything
except for the City Hotel, as I love their neon martini sign. Since there are virtually no tenants I figure that would be
cool."
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Lozierville Wants New Ball Field
"It just makes sense to have it here"
Westfield, MA / December 3, 2007 - At a press conference
tonite at the Gem Opera House on Elm Street in Westfield, Westfield Wheelmen Owner, Anheiser Van Pilsner, announced plans
for a base ball field to be built on land adjacent to the Pope Manufacturing Plant. Pilsner was quoted as saying, "It
just makes sense to have it here." No further details were available at press time.
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